Wednesday, October 10, 2018

How to Avoid a Pity Party

Hide and Seek Verses -- Part 3
My fellow missionary made a difficult phone call to me. She already had three young children and her hands were full, but she called to tell me she had just found out she was unexpectedly expecting again. What made the phone call even more complicated, was that I was in the midst of secondary infertility. I had trouble getting pregnant a second time and the day after the pregnancy was confirmed, I lost the baby. Now I was living month-by-month with hopes rising and then dashed.

With thirty years of hindsight, I appreciate my friend having the courage to tell me herself, but at the time I was heart-broken. Why would God give another child to someone who was already feeling overwhelmed and not to my husband and I, who desperately wanted another child?

When I hung up, I distinctly remember thinking, “I’m going to go upstairs, throw myself on my bed, and have a full on pity party, crying until there are no more tears.” Before I placed my foot on the first stair, God brought to mind a verse I had recently memorized:

O the depth of the riches of both the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and how unfathomable His ways. Romans 11:33

I had memorized the verse in Spanish and it gave extra meaning to the word “unfathomable” as the word in Spanish was “inescrutable”—inscrutable, impossible to understand.

Through His Word, God said to me, “Don’t try to understand what I do. Just trust Me.” I never did have that pity party, instead I realized God knew what He was doing, even if I didn’t understand it. I wish I could say that the next two years I had victory everyday, but I didn’t. Sometimes I just wanted a baby more than I wanted to trust God.

But God spoke to me that day through a verse I had memorized and His Word overcame my emotions. Memorizing Scripture will work in your life, too. Try it!

As you move toward getting your family to move toward memorizing scripture together, consider reading this post to your family, then ask these questions at dinner tonight:

What is the last verse you memorized? 
What verse has had a direct impact on your life?

Next week I will tell you one more story about how memorizing scripture impacted my life and I will give you some hacks to get your family having fun and spiritual growth memorizing too!

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  1. Thank you for this testimony of how the Holy Spirit used God's Word to minister to you at the right time. I have been that friend who needed to announce my pregnancy to a friend who just had a loss. It is not easy on either side of the picture. But just like you said, we are still friends years later, and now we recognize how hard that time was.

    1. Rachel, thank you for writing. Later in my life I was the one who told a friend who desperately was wanting a baby that I was pregnant again. I hadn't told anyone we were looking for a 4th child (after our losses we adopted and gave birth within a year and 4 years later decided we'd like one more if that was in God's plan for us), so it was a complete surprise because everyone thought we were "done". You're right, it's not easy either way, but God can work through it all.

  2. I'm so sorry that you've struggled to get pregnant, Sharon. I know that would be just heartbreaking to me. But there are other things that I desperately want in my life and so far God has not opened the door for those things. So I've been tempted to throw a few pity parties, but like you, my faith has grown stronger through those harsh realities. God always knows best! Thanks for sharing so vulnerably! I'm pinning to my infertility board.

    1. Thanks for writing, Beth. You'll be happy to know that now we have 4 children--one by adoption and two more biologically (after a total of 3 miscarriages) and seven grandchildren!

  3. I just said yesterday that I needed to start memorizing scripture again and starting the kids on memorizing as well. Thanks for the confirmation.

    1. I restarted about a year and a half ago. I now am reviewing 116 verses on a regular basis. Many I had learned in the past, but reviewing them keeps them in my mind more.



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